can I skip class to go to a concert?

Did I tell you that I have recently took up teaching? It’s Human Biology 2216. My students are 21 year-olds.  When I thought 21 year-olds couldn’t be cute anymore, Jenna came in. She is an exchange student from the US doing pre-med in my University. Last week she told me that she wants to skip one lab session because she had something on that week(end). Well, I thought I might be that teacher who will flip out and will not understand when a student wants to skip a class. But what do you know? I am not! I said all right and everybody was very happy. Then I changed my mind and told her that the next lab is a very important lab she would be missing a lot if she skipped it. And she told me the truth that her reason to skip the lab was because she wanted to go for a concert in Melbourne. How cute is that? and she actually said that well, I will still try to go to the lab on a different day. did she just feel guilty? and am I that scary?..lol

=^.^=

If you are an adopted child you will know this…

In just about any class that you were in at any one of the schools that you’ve been, you’d probably remember seeing the classmate with that Harmione-like personality. Almost 90% of the time, that person will be girl… She was always the first person to put her hands up, always the first student to volunteer an answer and amongst other things, never failed to seem like an annoying know-it-all. Typically, she studies like the fate of the world depends on her answers on that piece of OMR paper. Her ridiculously excessive fear of failure almost make everyone else want to vomit. She adheres to the school discipline like a UHU gluing 2 pieces of cardboard papers together. Why does she has to be good in every subject? Who was she trying to impress? Well, she certainly didn’t impress you,did she?

Not many years later, the girl grew into a woman. When everyone else was trying to built a family, she was trying her hardest to expand her career. Everyone can see how selfish this girl is, pushing her way forward not even glancing at all the other people affected by her actions and decisions. Being a brainer, everything seems so easy for her… Everything always turned out right, all the times.. Teachers, love her.. She always got the attention of the “important” people in the society, everywhere she turns her head, people seems to cheer for her.. HOW UNFAIR.. 

But did you know that beneath the strong, “I can do everything” look, lies an insecure child who only ever wanted to be accepted and loved and most importantly appreciated? Something happened when she was a young girl that made her thinks that if she didn’t do her very best, she will not be loved, and may be she will be given away… to this girl, the only way for her to be appreciated is to be the best that she can be…then only people that matters will notice her, and probably love her a little bit. Lacking any other talent what so ever, her only solution is to try her hardest, hard works included. In her life, she never knew what a restful sleep is. her stomach churns at the thought of going to bed at 11 pm because in her dictionary sleeping early means laziness, and laziness is next to failure. She could not accept failure because failure will ruin her… failure will lose her the most important thing in her life, the love of a family.

If you are an adopted child you will know this. In the life of an adopted child, there is a constant battle to be the best to win the adopted parents heart. (because typically, any parent prefer a child that he/she can gloat about…either for their looks, for their talents or for their exam results). But this annoying, career driven woman was never adopted..yet her insecurity is exactly like one.

A lot of people would think that “coming from a broken family” never really affected anyone, well, for one person, it does. All of her life, she had always wondered would she turned out to be a more relaxed, less stressed out and a much less neurotic person than she is now if her family had been perfect. But now, she would never knew it, would she?

The gift of a family is the best gift of all. Therefore, for any person who had to work so hard all her life just to feel accepted by her own family would be the worst feeling in the world. So why don’t you give her a break. stop looking at her like she is trying to dominate the world and boost her ego… this woman, is still and will forever be a broken child trying to feel appreciated.

Those good old dreams The Carpenters

I would trade a good night sleep to be able to talk to my friends again. And tonight, may be I will.

When I was very young, I had no friends… particularly because mom was fairly protective over her children and I am a girl, pretty awkward for most of the times, very quiet and highly prejudice over strangers. Even if mom was not protective, I reckon, I will have problems to make friends anyway. And I am glad for that because those few friends that I made are for life.

To a person with extreme personalities like the child me, having fun might prove to be problematic. But you are wrong… because I have loads of imaginary friends.I never saw them, I know there was nobody there but I imagined that there was a listener at the receiving end…It was like writing in a diary, where people always address their journals as “dear Diary” as if the diary is a living person, or a friend.. I talked to my imaginary friends all the time… Obviously they never ever talk to me back, but I like it that way. So, to my imaginary friends I confided everything and I do feel safe confiding to pure nothingness.

Now that I am married, I prevented myself from talking to them anymore… mainly because I do not want to seem crazy.  Furthermore, I now have many other channels to ventilate my emotions, fears and triumphs.. like keeping a journal or writing a blog for example. But any information passed in written form has always the possibility to be leaked and I am a very prejudice person, so truth to be told, writing never gives the same satisfaction as actually talking to a friend… there are just so many things that I couldn’t dare to write. Like how angry and unjustified I feel at the moment, words can not describe it. 

so yes, my friends are back and I am just waiting for a moment to be absolutely alone so that I can talk to them again. sadly, I am never alone. I tried to be, but I can’t. So if people wonders why I love to go to my office at 12 midnight? then the perfect answer will be because the world looks beautifully empty in the middle of the night. I can do my work without anyone bothering me… well, I do hate to be bothered while I am at work, but over time, I learnt to make exceptions. I would trade a good night sleep to be able to talk to my friends again. And tonight, may be I will.

 

There is one peculiar thing about the death of a loved ones. You just don’t feel like it’s death, it just feels like the person who left was only leaving to a faraway place… and that there is always a glimmer of hope that they would some time reappear at the door smiling.

Last year, a week before Ramadhan, my family received a shocking news. My brother’s father in law passed. He had been unwell for a couple of months before finally lost his consciousness due to a possible perforated gastric ulcer. The allahyarham was a good man, with a relatively young family. He left a widow, and children who are still schooling. My brother took over the role of the family head during that trial time. He had only been married for 2 years, but what is two years when you can already feel like a family to a stranger you have just known for 2 weeks?

I was taken aback by the whole thing, cried a little bit at the office, but a day rest was all that I got, not enough time to fly myself back to Malaysia. So we prayed from afar. What I heard from my mom was that my sister in law & her mother were devastated. I am glad that my mom & my dad, though separated, both offered and helped my brother through that time of great despair. What was i thinking? of course they’d help.

It’s Ramadhan again… and I can’t seem to shake the fact that last Ramadhan was so traumatic for a member of my family that I am slightly still affected by it. Good to see that after a year, there are smiles (and loads of it too, Alhamdulillah..) in my sister in law’s pretty face. But as in this moment, I was thinking about her mother. Since she was married, there had been no Ramadhan celebrated without her husband. Sadly, this will be the second.  There is one peculiar thing about the death of a loved ones. You just don’t feel like it’s death, it just feels like the person who left was only leaving to a faraway place… and that there is always a glimmer of hope that they would some time reappear at the door smiling.

 

Well, the truth is they are already “home”. It is us who are still on a journey and may be called home anytime soon.

Happy Ramadhan everyone,

It’s the second tenth of Ramadhan magical nights.

Make a full use of them.

Toodles,

Ana

My midnight routine

Recently I took up teaching. This is completely not part of my PhD requirement, but as a future Lecturer with no teaching background whatsoever, this is a good work experience for me. I gather, if I could teach 2nd and 3rd year pre-med students in UWA, teaching 1st and 2nd year UM Medical & Dental students won’t be too difficult. Besides, it is a good deviation from my usual research stuff and I can also gain “teaching” confidence from it.

I should say that it is not easy to teach. mainly because I need to be extra organized with my time. teaching requires a lot of prep works… and prep works can be a bit of a hassle especially when you realized that you haven’t been revising the topics that you need to teach for quite a while… since you are the teacher, you need to be extra knowledgeable than your student, so like it or not, prep works do include loads of readings, understandings and memorizing stuffs. Now, because my subject also includes loads of gross anatomy and histology works, so that means I also have to revise my anatomy & histology skills… but they are quite easy, Alhamdulillah..  

UWA, provides web learning.. meaning that each and every student can access lecture, lab and revision materials online.. even past year papers are available online. it’s kind of cool really because students no longer have to carry text books everywhere. I come to think that my “student” years are quite pre-historic and old. I wonder if we could implement the same thing in the universities in Malaysia..(if we have the money of course…)

So ever since I took up teaching, my midnight routine has involve studying materials for next week/tomorrow’s class.. preparation usually takes few hours but at times it could take up the whole night.

So students out there, do you think you alone have to study? guess what, we lecturers have to double the effort at studying than you. . . so appreciate your lecturers and do not skip classes.

=^.^=

Toodles,

Ana

She then showed me her forearm and I saw it for the first time, the inscription “alif, lam, lam ha” mimicking a wheal but it was not a wheal. It was just there a maculopapular erythematous rash spelling the word “ALLAH” in Arabic. Now, I have never seen any such wonder…It took some moments to digest the whole thing and to rearrange my thoughts clearly. I suddenly realized that this is no coincidence anymore. “This” must be a sign!

Passionate, passionate entry I wrote few days ago. Owh, that’s Intan Suhana Zulkafli. Didn’t Miranda told me that I was gutsy & strong?…and I was only presenting my research proposal.

Finally Ramadhan made it’s way to my complicated world. Unlike many years ago, I never had the urge to “celebrate” Ramadhan. It just felt like any other month except for the fact that I can not eat or be seen eating in public during the days. But this year it felt different. I can still feel the disappointment when they said that Ramadhan in Perth is one day delayed than in KL. and I felt so envious of the people in KL that can fast and join tarawikh when I can’t. And now that Ramadhan is here, it really feels like I am in the middle of the “celebration” again.

I think one of the reasons why I am way too excited for the arrival of this holy month is probably because of a fellow colleague. She’s an Australian girl of an Afghan origin. Her parents left Afghanistan to work in Australia and had both made their way up to the top since. In her own words, voice trembled by emotions she told me that “my parents are not religious at all,” so I imagined she had never been “enforced” to practice the teachings of Islam like many Muslim Malaysian girls do.  But I can see in her watery eyes that despite the “happy-go-lucky” lifestyle that she was allowed to adopt, she still wants to practice ISLAM. She wants to find Allah. I quote her to my best ability, “It was so heart breaking when you know that Allah is out there but you can’t feel Him anymore in your heart. It feels empty..Now that Ramadhan is near, I want to feel “it” again so I asked for a sign…” she had been reading the Quran but still felt a little bit lost. I was so sorry for her, but at the same time I was also thrilled that she is making her way back to Islam one baby step at a time.

She then showed me her forearm and I saw it for the first time, the inscription “Alif, Lam, Lam, Ha” mimicking a wheal but it was not a wheal. It was just there a maculopapular erythematous rash spelling the word “ALLAH” in Arabic. Now, I had never seen any such wonder…It took me some moments to digest the whole thing and to rearrange my thoughts clearly. I suddenly realized that this is no coincidence anymore. “This” must be a sign!

For it to happen to a friend, it was great. I think it was a message to tell her that Allah will never abandon anyone who is still looking for HIM. And I also felt so touched to be chosen to bear witness for such miracle.  I do not know what is the message HE had for me, but i do feel loved overbearingly by my creator. I hope this privilege was given to me because I had done something right but it could also be a message for me to make right of something that I had been doing wrong. Oh Allah, please guide me the way.

I had been engaged in many discussions about my religion countless of times. For some reason, I happen to be non-Muslim friendly, therefore the kind of person they could talk to when something about the practice of Islam bothered or intrigued them.. When I was younger, I had been lazy to explain the reasons behind my religious practices… but I am no longer a naive teenager who follows the religion because her parents asked her to. I am an adult who is free to make my own executive decision on what religion I want to practice and how much I want to practice it. And I have just realized that even if Islam is so called the most difficult religion to practice, the most complicated to understand and the strictest to follow especially in terms of female clothing etc, if someone held my neck at the tip of a sword, I would gladly die rather then to be forced to leave Islam. Although this might be the most insignificant wish of all time,  I do wish that I could live and die as a proud Muslim that has served her purpose in life and is returning home to Allah with nothing but joy& pure happiness in her heart. InsyaAllah, Ameen…

“Happy Ramadhan everyone! Let this be a good one”

toodles,

Ana

Are you telling me that I should ignore what my religion told me and give her condoms, educate her on proper ways to take the pills or how to insert diaphragm into her 12-year-old vagina rather than grab that opportunity to rationalize with her?

Hye again, Sarah,

After a psychoanalysis of your 2 comments, and several other comments from the readers of this blog (wuoh, all of a sudden I have readers..haha) I have to say that in a way, my entries on pre-marital sex and teenage marriage, which is based on a news article from Malaysia) have “insulted” either you or your belief. If that is the case, then please know in your heart that I am very sorry and it is completely unintentional. In my defense, Ivy Josiah who made the original outrageous comment has first insulted me and my religion, hence those articles were produced. But I have also come to understand that our different ages, marital status, culture and religion have put all of us at a disadvantage when discussing this issue.

Sarah, I have only been in Australia for 2 years which renders me unqualified to comment about the social situation in Australia. but for an England born, Malay Muslim doctor who was bought up in Kuala Lumpur since 28 years ago, I think I have the complete right to discuss on the decline of the morality that are currently hitting the country, MY COUNTRY, MY BELOVED COUNTRY.

Now, let’s go to the centre of this topic. I am clearly talking about “offering the girl to marry before allowing her to engage in any sexual activities” while you are actually thought that I was referring to “force marriage after the child is already pregnant” which contributed to the problem.

being married for 3 years , I can picture myself having a 12-year-old daughter who is yet to sit for her end of primary school exam. I picture her to be young and naive and curious just like me when I was at that age.  In case I haven’t been able to instil  the proper teachings of Islam where pre-marital sex is highly undesirable and not to forget the filthiest of all sins comparable to killing another human being, then I can definitely imagine that this child as having an older “cooler”  boyfriend and engaging in activities that might lead to sex, eg, holding hands, kissing, cuddling etc. As a worried Muslim mother, taking into account that I know very well that if I do not interfere she will soon, very soon engage herself in the actual “SEX” are you telling me that I should ignore what my religion told me and give her condoms, educate her on proper ways to take the pills or how to insert diaphragm into her 12-year-old vagina rather than grab that opportunity to rationalize with her that “honey, think about it seriously, you are only 12, you are so young and beautiful, you have a bright future ahead of you, do you still think that this 13-year old boy is “the one” you want to spend you whole life with?" If you want “it” so desperately, mommy and daddy will go see his parents and discuss about getting the two of you to be married, but think about it Honey, is this what you want for your life?”

If I chose to give her the condoms, I know that I have successfully prevent her body from being harmed (accidentally being pregnant or contracting a sexually transmitted disease), but deep down I know I have failed to actually educate my child. firstly, it is not normal for a 12-year-old to desire sex but even if she does, it is still not normal to allow her to have it just because she wants it. what kind of individual will she be in the future? If today I tell my 16-year-old son that “Darling, here is 20 dollars, go buy some condoms. Don’t just have sex with your girlfriend unprotected", I don’t want us to have to be responsible for your baby.” wouldn’t he thinks that I am ok with him being promiscuous? when the fact is NO! I am actually NOT OK with it!! It is filthy!! it is sinful!! it so contradicts my belief as a MUSLIM!!!! I can not bear to be a hypocrite just because that is what considered as the norm. And my children are Muslims too, it is my responsibility to teach them right from wrong, the Islamic ways.

If this is the kind of person I taught them to be, what kind of “Muslim”generation am I fostering? THE KIND THAT DOES NOT PRACTICE ISLAM, of course.

And do you think my sin of not taking proper care of my children and to not teach them the Islamic ways of things will go unpunished? It is easy, so easy indeed if no matter what we do on earth everyone will still go to heaven once they are dead, but sadly, that is not the case here. I don’t want to be burnt in hell together with my children, and their children and their grand children after them. not only that, I can not bear to even think that there will be illegitimate children in my blood line ever! If I don’t have the passion to prevent sex outside marriage (be it protected or not) then who will? If the government of Malacca does not make the initiative to prevent sex outside marriage then who will? because the issue now is unlawful sexual intercourse, not whether or not there is a baby involve. Because as we prevent unlawful sex, we will prevent  illegitimate babies and as a consequence of that, preventing abandon babies from being mauled by stray dogs. 

You on the other hand wanted to prevent accidental pregnancies and sexual transmitted diseases, therefore I have to say that the Australian government & education system had done you good. You have become their model of what a responsible Aussie is. If I am your reproductive biology lecturer, I will be so proud of you because clearly you understand everything taught at school. A+++ for that =^.^=. If I am born in a different religion, I will agree with you. because of the practicality of condoms, I will suggest it to these young teenagers.. because everyone knows that if they want to have sex, they will. they don’t think about consequences do they? they hardly even think twice… so  the best way  is prevention..

Now, if accidental pregnancies still happen to my daughter, a Muslim girl, will I want to force her to marry the boy who did that to her? NOT IN A ZILLION YEARS, THANK YOU. do you think that irresponsible boy can be a good husband to my daughter, No Thanks! I’d rather my daughter suffer the pregnancy alone and then give the baby away for adoption than let my daughter marry the boy. that stupid, stupid boy…. I will be completely disgusted at the utter thought of how the baby was brought to the world, to even care about it. No doubt that the baby is innocent and lovable..so once I made sure that he goes to a good family I will deal with this sinful daughter of mine. She will have to repent and learnt from this mistake to not repeat it again in the future and I will make sure that she becomes a good Muslim from then on.

Needless to say in the end we all want to prevent unwanted teenage pregnancies and prevent innocent newborn babies from being abandon on the streets of Malacca or Malaysia for that matter, only that I want so much more than that. I wanted ZERO SEX OUTSIDE MARRIAGE, I WANTED PURE UNDERSTANDING OF ISLAM,  AND I WANTED MUSLIMS TO ACTUALLY PRACTICE THE TEACHING OF ISLAM. but at least we still agree on one thing and I am glad that we do.

 

till then , Sarah, do come again to this humble blog. =^.^=

A religion does not change for the people, the people will have to change for the religion. because we believe that our lives do not end with the last beat of our heart nor with our last breath. there is still the matter of the good goes to heaven and the non-performers (sinners) go to hell... so as much as I'd love to agree when you say "the only difference contraception will have is to ensure their behaviour does not result in a child or disease", I couldn't because the one I have to agree with is Allah. not just me, but the entire Muslim population are with me.

Hye Sarah,

First and foremost, thanks for reading. i never thought anyone would read my blog to be honest =^.^=. I am so happy that you actually spent time to read this lengthy entry of mine.. now, let's get down to business.

I have to agree with you on the fact that allowing child marriage as not "the answer" to preventing childhood/teenage pregnancies. But I am firmly saying that in "certain circumstances" it still is.

Never in a million years will I be agreeing that a 22-year-old college drop out could be a good mother let alone a 14-year-old teenager, (hence the reason why I am still not thinking about getting pregnant) but at least by being in a marriage institution, the future of the babies that they carry is more guaranteed than if they were left without a father, without grand fathers or grand mothers that are physically able to provide not only financial but also emotional support..

you have to understand that Islam is a delicate religion. you don't choose to be a Muslim to only practice just the parts of the religion that you like and abandon the one that you don't. So when the religion clearly states that "NO SEX OUTSIDE MARRIAGE" then, that means there should be no sex outside marriage (pre-marital sex and adultery both included). and this ridiculous rule as many people might see it is there for a reason. It is to protect our blood lineage from "impurities" so to speak.

if anyone is allowed to have sex with just about anyone, and have babies as a consequence of that, there is a possibility that a brother might accidentally marry his own baby sister without even knowing it. we all know that not only that poses a serious spiritual threat but science has also proven that marriages that occur within the same genetic pool will enhance any potentially life threatening recessive traits. Although nobody has actually done a research on this ( or may be they have, only I am totally ignorant about them) but I have a hunch that probably the rising numbers of incurable diseases (e.g., cancers, metabolic disorders, mental disorders etc) that began to rise as the contraception industry gained popularity could be partially contributed by this. and when I said "this" i meant accidental sibling marriages.

because protecting the purity of the blood lineage is VERY important in Islam, any assisted reproductive techniques that involve fertilization of eggs from an anonymous sperm donor (obviously the woman at the receiving end is not married to the donor)is also STRICTLY PROHIBITED IN ISLAM. That is HOW SERIOUS WE ARE AT THIS MATTER!

so going back to the issue of allowing child marriage, i have to say that this is a very drastic action but a drastic action is perhaps what we need right now in Malaysia what with the numbers of abandon babies in trash bins, public toilets and bushes are currently already off the chart. (Sarah, condoms and the pills have been invented long before Malaysia achieved it's independence...if these people want to use them, they would have used them. and if they have been using them there won't be abandon babies all over the places.. so clearly they don't.)

Force marriage is probably the best answer at the moment if these youngsters are still insist on being promiscuous. the fact that they have to marry the guy will give them time to think and rationalize that "what good would it do to me & my future if I have to marry this loser? I'd better abstinent from sex until the right man comes along.till then, I'd better study and be a doctor or a dietitian instead" =^.^=

because i well and truly believe with every cells and molecules in my body that even the best and most effective of contraception, when given freely especially to 12-14 year old children,IT WILL FAIL. even if it works to prevent unwanted pregnancy it fails miserably to uphold the morality that Islam is based on.

A religion does not change for the people, the people will have to change for the religion. because we believe that our lives do not end with the last beat of our heart nor with our last breath. there is still the matter of the good goes to heaven and the non-performers (sinners) go to hell... so as much as I'd love to agree when you say "the only difference contraception will have is to ensure their behaviour does not result in a child or disease", I couldn't because the one I have to agree with is Allah. not just me, but the entire Muslim population are with me.
Owh, i should also add that even if I am so boldly against the practice of contraception amongst unmarried teenagers, I do think that It is one of the best thing ever invented for married women who want to plan their pregnancies and stop we woman from being a baby machine. kudos to whomever that first invented it.

in other religions that see contraception as the best way to prevent unwanted or unwed pregnancies, I respect your decisions. I am a very liberal person, but also happen to be a stricter Muslim than many.

I understand completely that your position as a proud women activist requires you to stand up to prevent child marriages. But lets be realistic, if a “reproductively matured” 14-year-old already knows how to have sex and actually wanted to, she is not a child anymore. If she seeks sexual partner or partners for that matter, face the fact that she will produce an offspring.

(Reuters) - A Malaysian state is to allow Muslim girls under the age of consent of 16 years to wed in a bid to stem unwed pregnancies, angering the country's women's activists and politicians.

The Islamic council in the southern Malaysian state of Malacca on Tuesday announced that it would to allow marriage for Muslims below the current minimum age of 16 years for females and 18 for males.

"This is an outrage. We're turning back the clock when there's ample evidence to show that we should not condone child marriages," said Ivy Josiah, executive director of Women's Aid Organization, a rights group.

Muslims make up about 60 percent of the 28 million population of the Southeast Asian country and fall under Islamic family and criminal laws individually drafted and run by each of the country's 13 states. Non-Muslims come under federal civil laws.

The chief minister of Malacca, Mohammad Ali Rustam, said permission would only be granted after consent by the teenager's families as well as the state Islamic courts.

"For the state government, this is the best step to deal with the problem of abandoned babies and unwed pregnancies," he was quoted as saying by the Utusan Malaysia newspaper.

Malacca earlier announced that the state would open a special school for Muslim girls who become pregnant out of wedlock, a move that also came under fire from rights groups.

taken from http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE6733BS20100804 (here)

Finally someone is doing something to help solve the ever rising cases of unwanted teenage pregnancies and hopefully also put an end to the cases of abandon babies. Well, I have no doubt that it is going to be a tough job, given the amount of “exposure” teenagers are receiving nowadays from paid TVs, internet, video clips and many more…surely difficult to control their raging libido. Whatever it is, it’s a good start..In fact, an Awesome start!

As I read the article, I was pleased that out of so many states, Malacca made the first initiative to allow teenage marriage if circumstances required her so. But my happiness didn’t last long as I learned how angry the executive director of women’s aid organisation was with this news. She said “This is an outrage! We're turning back the clock when there's ample evidence to show that we should not condone child marriages.”

Ample evidence you said? haven’t you seen enough of abandon babies from the news? Some were mauled by stray dogs, and some were even buried alive. Now, I am ashamed to say that the bulk of those abandon babies do happen to be Malays and most probably of Muslim origin… But not all of them are Muslims either. When so many people point fingers to the decline of familial institution, delinquancy (if that is even a word) and so many more, aren’t you relieve to know that at least the someone is doing something to solve this problem? 

I understand completely that your position as a proud women activist requires you to stand up to prevent child marriages. But let's be realistic, if a  “reproductively matured” 14-year-old girl already knows how to have sex and actually wanted to, she is not a child anymore. if she seeks sexual partner or partners for that matter, face the fact that she will produce an offspring. Unwanted, unwed pregnancies like these are associated with extreme social stigmas. Parents will disowned her and as usual her partner wouldn’t want to be responsible for the baby, and in an act of desperation, she will abandon the baby in a nearby bushes or trash bin and leave it to die… wouldn’t it be better if she got married on the first place? There will be no problem with the baby being unwanted, there is no question about the father running away. and even if he runs, the girl family will still take care of her. A much, much better outcome for both the baby and the teenager.

Well, I also know that you’d immediately say marriage will ruin the girl’s life because she will be forced into being a wife, being a mom and being a personal slave to her husband. If sex is what she afters, let her have sex and give her condoms instead. Well, it is so happen that the religion that we are talking about right now is Islam. Sexual “freedom” is not an option. Giving out condoms will only promote sexual promiscuity which is against the teaching of Islam. For an Islamic country like Malaysia, we can not afford to do that. So the proposal to allow teenage marriage is very reasonable indeed.

The fact that you wanted to ban teenage marriage but in a way allow teenage pregnancy is absurd. In Western countries where condoms are available everywhere and people are allowed to have sex as they please, still there are “accidents”. Underage pregnancies and illegal abortions are indeed 2 of the most serious social problems in these countries to date. So clearly, giving away condoms, sexual education and free contraceptive pills are not the answers. It is best if we could teach these girls to actually does not desire sex before marriage. But that is not going to happen in a million years what with the “over sexualized” media that we have right now. So, what else can a State Islamic organisation do as a short term management of unwed pregnancies other than to allow teenage marriage… with strict regulations of the matter of course. 

Before an outrageous comment is made to the media, I think it is wise that you actually think about why such decision is made on the first place because just so you know, these people who made the decisions are not stupid. They are also specialists in their areas just like any of us. Don’t assume that just because it is about the religion Islam then in will be bias and oppressive towards women. I’m a Muslim and a woman, and I think this is a good start.