Thursday, December 31, 2009

:: resolution ::


I don't have one
I have many
I don't remember if I've fulfilled my last year's
But I do know that I have lived the last year well




I don't know if I can call myself successful
But I know I have made good choices that I'm satisfied to live with












I can't say that I'm fully content with my life now
Coz I always know that there are still so many rooms for improvement still..

I don't have to declare my resolutions here or anywhere..
But i do have to promise that I will work hard to get what I want and what i think I deserve for the year ahead.

2009 had been wonderful with strengthen family ties,




Had been joyful with new found friendships,




Had been meaningful with unspoken true love,




Had seen tears with the passing of a close relative..

But most of all 2009 had been well lived [pull stop]

I welcome you, the year 2010.
Another birthday and annyversary, InsyaAllah
Another international scientific presentation, InsyaAllah
The same but a brand new version of ME, ameen.





:: our shadows- they also miss each other.. Hope to see you again in 2010 ::

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Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Cuti2 Australia..Awww!!!

Heya All!!!

Assalamualaikum.. Owh, malunya tak setart dgn semekom dulu.. Neway, time org Len maseh bercuti kismes lagi kat sinih, Ana maseh sabor bekerja.. Wpun kije tetap kije, hatiku maseh tetap mood cuti.. So entry Kali nih pon tentang cuti muti jugerk.. Hehehe..




-wajahku bersama hot chocolate di Perth international airport masa musim sejuk-

Saya student lagi.. Manada duit yg menimbun2 tuk bercuti luor negare nie.. Duit2 kesayanganku telah di simpan ditempat yg selamat..insyaAllah.. Supaya aku tidak boros berbelanja saqan.. Hehehehe..

Maka entry percutian ini adalah ttg holiday my family yg datang melawat diriku di Australia ini.. Cewwah.. Australia ni besar.. Ana tggl kat Perth je.. Cam kampung je perth nie.. Bandar2 Besar kat Australia ni adalah Melbourne, Sydney, gold coast.. etcetera etcetera etcetera ...Perth ranking nombo 4.. Bawak Perth ialah Adelaide. Ana penah jugerk gi Adelaide to bukan tuk bercuti.. Sebalikbya utk tujuan lain. Tp thats another story, kita story another timelah yer...

Keamanan sejagat kat Perth ni mmg tak dapat dinafikan.. Yelah, kawasan kampung.. Org sumer baek2 je.. Berhemah dijalan raya, bersopan santun sumerlah.. Mmg seswai sgt tuk org yg nak menuntut ilmu cam saya.. Tak seswai org cam saya ni belajar di bandar besar2 sbb dikhuatiri Akan leka bershopping..Kikikiki..pengalaman menghabeskan beribu2 ringgit masa j-card day dulu sudah cukop tuk membuktikan tahap shopping saya ni mmg level TERATAS!! Ngeh ngeh ngeh...(ketawa smbil tersengeh..otherwise xkan bleyh wat bunyik cenggitu kan...)

Mak datang melawat Ana bulan 6 tahun lepas. 6-6-09 kot. Smggu je.. Tp itulah smggu yg sggh membahagiakan skali.. ( korg ampunkanlah saya nyer ejaan yg ala2 SMS nih.. Mmg sedang memblogz dalam tepon pon...)

Australia ni terbalik-kot dgn US Dan UK.. Time dorg salji sejuk beku bulan disember tu, sini paneh tak bleh nak cakap.. Bulu kening pun pakat berpeluh tak henti2.. Wa cakap lu, utk mengeluarkan peluh Dari kening secara eksklusif memerlukan suhu luaran mencecah 45 degree celsius tau.. (ngahahahaha.. acah jer), tp manatau mmg betul kan.. =P...Malaysia tak penah paneh cam nie.. Mekah Dan Madinah adalah panassss cenggini..(ckp pasal mekah, Teringin lak nak gi wat umrah.. Ya Allah permudahkanlah.. Ameen)

So time US dan UK tu summer, kitorang kat sini musim sejuks.. Ada 's' kat belakang tu nak menunjukkan yg sejuk tu plural.. Wahahahaha.. Sgt sejuklah maknanya tue.. Tu yang Ana pakai baju sejuk dalam gamba tu.. Time tu tgh tggu org Dari Malaysia nak sampai sini.

Seminggu bukanlah lama sgt tuk melawat seluruh Perth nie. Bak melawat daerah Perth je pun tak sempat, apatah lagi nak melawat daerah2 berdekatan can swan valley or Margaret river.. Tp seminggu dapat jmpe Mak & adik3 ( 3 org adik ikut) adalah sgt menghappykan. Pengalaman yg tak dapat dilupakan. Tatau nak cakap betapa rindunya kat dorg time tu sbb masa tu Ana dah duk perg setagun tp sekali pon xpenah balik mesia lgsg..

Allrite..Mak stay kat umah Ana smggu tu sbb umah Ana pun Besar... Ada 3 bilik.. 2 tingkat.. Bolehlah nak menempatkan 6 org yg dtg tu:
Mak, ayah, adik3 org and mak ngah( kakak emak). [Mak ngah bukan interframe tau, dia mmg Mak jmput ikut sbb dia xpenah gi luar negara lagi ( selain gi hajilah)..]

Lgpun Mak & makngah sgt kamcheng.. Masa Mak muda2 dulu, time baru clash ngan Abah, sblm Mak kawen ngan ayah, Mak ngah yg byk tolong Mak..owh, namun Ana bukanla nak bincangkan hal dolu2 tu skrg..this is suppose to be a happy entry ok..=^.^=

Spjg kat sini ayah sewa kreta No Bird.. Lawak giller Nama kete sewa.. Murah je 25 dollar sehari.. Keretanya pon comeyl je.. Toyota Yaris..ayah sgtlah hepi sbb dapat bersporty sekejap.. Kat mesia dia tak dapat nak naik kete sporty2 nie.. naik family car yg gedabak tu je.. Naza Ria..kikiki.. Ayahku yg sgt kelakar..





Sesampai kat umah Ana ktorg gi shopping kat Coles Claremont Quarter.. Coles nie cam shopping kat jusco lah kot.. Dalam gambar tu Mak (tudung kelabu) Dan Ana (tudung pink) tgh mambaca ingredient kat roti.. Mak ngah sedang memerhatikan Kami dgn khusyuknya... Bukan sng nak beli roti tau.. Ada byk benda xhalal yg org kilang tu letak nak bagi roti tu lembut dan sedap.. Kita sbg pembeli kenela berhati2...




Pas dah makan sarapan sandwich sardin buatan Mak n makngah yg tatau naper rasa sedapnya lain macam.. Hehehe.. Ana pun bw dorg gi jenjalan kat city of Perth. Tmpt shopping yg terkemuka kt sinih.
Nampak tak betapa ramainya org tgh soping saqan.. Hohohoho..Mak pusing 3-4 department store besar2 cam coles, myers, David jones, target.. Tp tak jumpe apa yg dia hendak.. Kami pun ikut je lah.. Smntara tu Mak ngah pakat beli coklat byk2...




Dah puas shopping di siang hari, malamnya hubby cadang bawak family Ana gi makan kat luar.. Penat weyh nak masak... Kitorg makan kat restoran Batavia.. Restoran Indonesia. Kat sini ada gak ayam penyet.. Tp our all tine favourite meal adalah Nasik Kuning Komplit.. Cedap cangat.. Kalo nak tau dtg ar sinih.. Ana bw jenjalan ok..blanja nasi kuning tu skali..

Haa dalam gamba tu, my bro Muhammad Aiman Zulkafli sdg menunggu menu yg diorder nye.. Da lapa sgt ar tue.. Kikiki.. Mak ngan Mak ngah tgh bising2 mempertikaikan ke"halal"an kedai ni.. Puasla Ana ensure yg kedai ni halal.. Sian Pak cik yg jual tu.. Tulah saper suh muka awak cam cina? Seb bek tukang masak n tukang hidang pompuan indon bertudung lagi solehah..kikiki..




Esoknya jenjalan kat swan bell.. Malam pun gi swan bell juga.. Naik eyes on Perth.. Yg kat titiwangsa tu tak naik pun, yg kat Perth pula ktorg sibuk nk naik.








Wajah2 eksaited adik2 ku.. Omar, Aiman Dan Rina. Lampu hijau kat belakang tu adalah bell tower..lawa ek pemandangan bandar Perth wktu mlm..












Time dorg bergamba kt pantai cottesloe ni Ana duk dalam kete je.. Hari tu Ada meeting ngan supervisor.. Padahal masa tu Ana cuti sbb baru abes hanta thesis master.. So takder mood nak bergambar.. Lagipun time tu pukul 7 pg.. Sejuk giler kat pantai. Ana yg duk dalam kete pon sejuk, dorg yg duk posing tu sumenye tgh menggigil.. Naseb bek photographer cekap. Tak nampak Gigi masing2 bergetar. Hehehehe..
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Monday, December 28, 2009

Sunyisssssss sgt!!!

We arrived at the department at around 10am. There were few cars parked at the department's parking lot. It means nothig though.. Probably those cars belong to holiday goers that usually have picnic at Matilda Bay during that hour..

The department was very quiet. Eerily quiet. It is amazing that in that kind if silence, the sound of wind blowing as the automatic sliding door closed can give you goosebumps. But I was not alone. My hubby was with me all the times.

He iniially only wanted to help me settle down in the office and will go home afterwards but with the eery silence and no corridor light switched on he felt that I should not be left alone. He was right.

So I did my microscope work for 3 hours non stop. Not much to done in 3 hours but at least I did something. Hubby watched war movie on his iPhone to pass the time.

When I finished, I took some pictures of us Chilling out, if you can say so... In the microscope room. We love it there coz of the air condition. Why? Coz outside is crazy hot with temperature reaching 39 degree celsius ar the moment...fuh!!!





Thanks temankan Ana tadi.. Boleh teman kan Ana lagi pasnie..





Aaa berposing dgn microskop Besar... Ngahahaha..

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Kerja time org Len cuti

Pagi ni bangun awal sket sbb hari isnin kene gi kerja. Buwek!! Tak aci btol.. Org len dpt cuti, Ana sowang je keje..hurm, Ingat nak wat pilates dulu tp cam dah tak sempat je.. Balik nanti baru buat lah. Tp sempat plak Ana intai2 harga mesin eliptical kat Internet.. Nak beli ke tak? Aaahh nantilah baru pikir.

Hari ni if bank westpac bukak ingat nak gi bayar deposit rumah percutian kat Claremont tulah.hurm, takut if lambat bayar nanti tuan rumah bagi kat org lain pulak.. Dah la Susah mencarinya.. Takkan nak senang2 lepaskan kat org lain pulak kan...rumah ni tuk Mak n family member yg lain. Dorg nk dtg sini musim sejuk nnti.. Bulan 6 tawun depan. Sbb ramai yg nak dtg, tpaksa Cari rumah lain.. Susah ar kalau Sumer org nak duk kat umah Ana.. Nak menjaga auratnya sgt melecehkan.. Kesian kat Rina nak jg auratnya ngan hubby ana.. And kesian jugak kat Mak ngah (kakak emak) sbb kene jg aurat ngan ayah tiri Ana...so penyelesaian terbaik... Cari rumah lain yg Besar Dan byk bilik supaya at least masa nak tido dorg tak perlu bertudung..

Last year Mak n family yg lain dtg jugak masa musim sejuk.. Masa tu Ana cuti. Dorg dtg smggu je time tu.. Ayah busy sgt.. Dia kan branch manager bank Islam cwgn selayang... Nak cuti sket pun Susah.. Tak bleh harapla assisstant dia tuh..

Tp sbb smggu je smpt shopping je la. Xsmpt nk gi tmpt2 menarik sgt. Zoo pergilah sbb nk tgk kangaroo n koala sgt.. Itu jelah kot.. Hari2 Len samada lepak kat pantai atau kat shopping complex.. Pantai da tak heran da sbb rumah Ana ni tepi pantai.. Tp dorg yg nak amik gmba sgt kat pantai Ana bawak jugaklah.. Bukan bleh Mandi manda pun.. Sejuk giller!! Suhu time tuh 6 degree celsius je tau..

Anyway entry ni sama skali bukan pasal percutian tawun lepas, tp adalah ttg hakikat yg saga kene kerja time org Len cuti.. Xmas cuti 2 mggu kt sinih.. Tp gue amik cuti 3 hari jer.. Hari ni smbg keje. Takperlah kan.. Asalkan keje siap sudahlah.. At least happy sket tak ramai org kat fakulti tu.. Kalau ramai org tp Sumer mabuk n buat bising nak buat apa kan..

Smntara cuti nih Ana amik gmbar campus.. Kwsn berpagar ni tmot student minum beer beramai2.. Ada ke geng2 non Muslim ni ajak Ana lepak kat situ? Haramla Ana nak gi sana.








Rasanya dorg letak pagar bb takut budak2 yg mabuk gi hentak org2 lain yg Jalan kat tepi2 tu kot.





Ni lah campus.. Cantik je biker takder org.. Kalau time busy penuh ngan org duk lepak2 kat Padang tu..







Oraitt Ana nak pen off dulu.. Time tuk gi keje.. Hahaha dah kul 9 ke.. Takper Biar lmbt asalkan slmt.. Hohoho




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Sunday, December 27, 2009

Food, glorious food

Ahah, our meals today had been salad, more salad, tau fu fah,and a bit of couscous...




The salad was rich in varieties. It was a combination of lettuce, baby spinach, blueberries and tomatoes put together lazily in a bowl. Not to forget crunchy walnuts and cashews. Chicken balls provided the animal based protein in this salad. I also added some chopped crabsticks to add a little bit of variations to the taste. Served with my homemade modified Dijon mustard dressing..
Just can't get enough...







Today's highly vege based meals are most probably a compensation to the heavy dinner we had last
night encompassing 2 large lobsters and a dozen of scrumptio-licious baked oysters..
Nyum!!! So we are officially giving our digestive systems the holiday it desperately needs.


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Room improvement

It's gonna be a Cheerfully short entry. Remember I told you that we bought a new airbed? It is now installed! My bed looks as good as new.. It feels as good as new too. I bet some ofbyou might be wondering about it's external appearance.. Knowing me, I am never half hearted when it comes to interior decoration... I think these pictures speak for themselves.






That's the bed. Queen size. Blue cotton slipcover. Pushed all the way to the window... The breeze from the nearby sea eases the hot summer afternoon.








Peeking outside the window, I could see my hubby working on his laptop.. Probably downloading something..

All pictures taken from iPhone 3GS 3 MP camera phone... And edited using photoforge and photodaily applications.
So, I'm sorry for the blurry, less-than-perfect photos...

Till then =^.^=


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Saturday, December 26, 2009

Boxing day shopping

All these while we have been sleeping on 2 airbeds pile on top of each other making a descent queen sized bed. Despite being extremely particular with the interior of my temporary student accommodation right here in Perth, I don't really mind having to sleep on airbeds a long as it provides the neccessary comfort needed for a good night sleep and it looks like a bed.

But the down side of having airbeds is that it'll only last a year at most. The one that I have desperately needs a replacement so on boxing day (26-12-09), we went out for a typical boxing day shopping in Garden City.

Honestly, I didn't anticipate anything interesting. It was just us going out on a typical shopping. But it turned out awesome.. Hehehehe. The place was crowded with people looking for bargains. And that means trying to look for a parking spot was a chore. I saw loads of Asians buying large stuffs in boxes.. Hurm, probably electrical goods or furnitures...

Well eventhough I know I will not enjoy this particular shopping trip owing to the crowd, nontheless it was necessary. I need a new air bed., hahahahaha. The whole trip turned out to be ok actually..

Firstly becoz I bought myself a new nighties from Peter Alexander!!! I am an absolute nighties fan. Stretchable cottons are my fav but they are usually painfully high priced., especially from Peter Alexander. But because it was boxing day, I was lucky to strike a bargain price of upto 50% off. I was plain 'ol lucky, I guess..




It was such a charming
dress. Peachy pink i colour, with ruffles, very girly..Bought it from David jones, though.. I should just go to the boutique but I was in a hurry. While hurrying home, guess who I bumped into? Out of so many people in this world I bumped into our previous Prime Minister Pak Lah.. Lol!!! I guess everyone loves boxing day shopping..=^.^=


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Friday, December 25, 2009

:: PhD Life ::



The title is seriously funny. What PhD student has a life that can be considered as "A life"  at all?
I'm not being cynical... NO I'M NOT!  I am only being realistic.


We are poor, and sometimes only survive on instant noodle

I have encountered a situation when I literally live on weekly basis. Scraping on whatever I have in the almost-empty-fridge to survive. Thinking twice, sometimes thrice on whether I should buy that loaf of bread. Whatever extra money is kept to pay the rent and household bills. The house rent alone costs me AUD 1140 a month.

We  are constantly busy doing something that is against our will

Doing research is not exactly very enjoyable. I would certainly choose a different adjective for research. Such proper adjectives will be IMPOSSIBLE or CRAZY or SOUL DRAINING…especially soul draining..

Our bosses get cheap, if not free labour from our goodwill

Since we are lawfully sponsored by the government, and our supervisors, which is the only boss that have the ability to steer the working environment into either pleasant or horrible, is also the only person in the world  that the government listens to in order to ensure a continual sponsorship, like it or not a PhD student will have to obey on whatever extra work needed to be done to receive good comments on his or her working attitude. It will be lucky if you get paid whatever value it will be. But most often than not, it will be a free service.

We are suffering from a continuous repressed anger over ourselves, or our boss, or that other student that stole our findings.. These things stayed repressed and can eventually cause a mental breakdown

~ 5% of graduate student actually flung the whole thing because of some form of mental breakdown..usually depression, but I'm not surprised if some might even have bipolar, or schizo for that matter..ngehehehehe.. It never happen to me though..=^.^=

We missed out on the "real social functions"..

the ones I go to always have a certain peculiarity on their names, like "ANNUAL GALA FOR MEDICAL RESEARCHERS" or "ANNUAL DINNER FOR THE SOCIETY OF REPRODUCTIVE BIOLOGY" and something like that. The core of the events always involve someone giving a speech on either research or academia.. People were excited at the number of papers published instead of in what I imagine in a "real social functions" where people congratulating each other on their marriage or their new babies..Our friends from previous universities or schools have gatherings and weddings and outings and purposefully forget to invite us.


Lame, I know.

That is why I just couldn't explain this excitement that I feel vibrating inside every single cell in my body when I walk those steps towards my PhD student's office?

Why the hell that I'm almost bouncing off my feet when I walked to the stereology room in full anticipation as if something unexpected and exciting is going to happen?

Why oh why did I feel pressured in reading all these journals day in and day out like they are an addictive vampire fiction that is impossible to put down?

Well friends, though I hate to admit it... I think I've found the answer. I have become the scary person I never thought I could ever be. I have embraced research like it is part of me, like it is part of what makes me, ME..  I LOVE RESEARCH.

The only thing that I have to do now is to stop my brain from imagining me looking like Einstein. No offense, Prof Einstein..I just think that your hair is so out of style. hahahahaha..

So what if I wanna love research?
It wouldn't have hurt if I become a hot scientist doctor would it?

Pregnancy scare

I have always imagined myself as a student. Sitting at a desk either doing some written work or reading some articles.. Exactly something like what I'm doing right now. It is as much as seeing myself as a wife. Always belong to someone else. I'm never a free woman but I like it that way.

With marriage comes responsibility or so they said.. I'm not afraid of responsibilities, as a student or as a wife or as the person that I ought to be ( in my case, a Muslim lady in this foreign land) but boy I'm chickened out to be a mommy.

YES. I'm scared of being a mom, and just about anything to do with creating a kid. And it is painful as that is the natural outcome people around me are expecting from a marriage.

It made no sense. I'm not a teenager having a pregnancy scare after a drunken night out with her boyfriend.. Anything I do that might lead to pregnancy will be completely legitimate.. But I don't wanna be pregnant yet. Not now. Not when I was doing my housemanship, not when I was doing my masters and not now while I'm doing my phd. So when is the best time? I honestly don't know.

My dear father had been pestering me about getting him a grandchild since the day I was officially belonged to my husband... And I had been avoiding the subject with all of my medical and science and general knowledge combined. He now had given up the hope of trying to ever change my mind about having a child. And that really ease the tense.. At least a little bit.

What am I so scared of?
I seriously don't know for sure. The few things that I do know are:

A) I'm scared of the
pregnancy itself.
i) The fact that people lose their lives for the birth of another.
ii) the arrays of medical conditions associated with being pregnant.. And being a doctor actually made the fear even worse.
iii) I have an aunty who suffered from eclampsia after giving birth to her youngest daughter. Now, despite complete recovery she has to make do with an eyesight of a blind woman. No spectacle can correct her vision. And though most people would say that it will be the best sacrifice, as she now has in her arm the most adorable little girl, my lack of maternal instinct just couldn't comprehend how such sacrifice is justifiable to her.. She will never ever be able to see the perfect features of the new baby for as long as she shall lives.

Even so, I know these are not solid reasons to avoid being a mother. if God says that you are gonna be blind, you will be.. You don't have to be pregnant for that. So why the heck that I'm still so deym scared?

Trust me, I dunno.

Call me crazy if you might... coz I'll be glad to embrace whatever nasty thoughts you might have against me but I'm not gonna buldge...not a bit from my current opinion about pregnancy.. Pregnancy IS SCARY.

Oh I don't mind being a mother.. If someone might just give me a cute baby for free, why not.. I know that I'm good at taking care of small children. But not to carry them in my belly.. No! Especially not that.. At least not yet.

I'm not stupid though. At this moment, I'm doing all I can to make sure that I am fit and healthy so that if "it" does happen to me,my body is gonna be capable of handling the stress of it all.. But if it happen soon, I know in my mind that I Am SO NoT READY YET.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Rumah ku, syurga ku

Time rajin membelogz ni, apakata post sekali environment rumah seorg PhD student di Australia.. Ngehehe..


Artwork gue.. Jd hiasan kat Almari tv ikea. Ngeeee =^.^=


Balkoni ku cam Taman.. Suker!!



Letak blinds kat balkoni tu supaya ana boleh melepak kat situ Tanpa perlu bertudung.. Org xnmpak Dari luar.. Bijak kan my hubby...


Ruang tamu.. Sofa bed ikea..=^.^=

Erm, tak sempat amik pic for kitchen n bedroom.. Tak yah la kot kan sbb nmpk cam nak promote rumah sendiri plak.

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Friday, December 4, 2009

::Alwiz In My ::heart::




alwiz know that you are my number ones
=^.^=

love,

Dr Intan Suhana Zulkafli, M.D. MSc
PhD candidate
School of Anatomy & Human Biology
University of Western Australia

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

can muslim befriends the non-muslim?


Wujudkah hubungan silaturrahim antara orang bukan islam dan orang islam?


Sebagai muslim dan sebagai pengamal agama islam..(bukan islam pada nama ajer, ok..) Ana percaya bahawa kita sebagai orang islam harus sentiasa mendahului dalam hal menunjukkan contoh yang terbaik pada orang lain disekeliling kita. Ana bukan ustazah, malah hanya mendapat pendidikan islam dari sekolah biasa, pembacaan dan pendidikan dari rumah sahaja. So maby pendapat ana tak boleh dijadikan rujukan..But at the same time, ana juga seorang wanita islam yang berpendidikan tinggi, dan mempunyai ramai sahabat karib berbilang bangsa dan agama. Bersentuh bahu dengan kawan bukan islam bukanlah asing bagi ana.


Mendapat pendidikan menengah di sek men Hillcrest, Seri Gombak..my school basically adalah sekolah biasa2 ajer.. Bilangan student lelaki dan perempuan sama banyak, bilangan student melayu dan bukan melayu juga sama banyak. Gombak adalah sebuah daerah yang sangat majmuk. Percampuran antara kaum pasti wujud dan I must say ia wujud dengan sangat mutual sekali. Tader gadoh2, isu2 sensitif sentiasa dielakkan demi menjaga hati setiap kaum.


Kawan2 ana kebanyakannya pengawas sekolah sbb ana pon pengawas jugak.antara kawan bukan islam yang rapat dgn ana ialah Geradline, Jaclyn, Stella dan Puvan..Teoh pun rapat jugak..mereka beragama Kristian, Hindu dan Budha. Ana rapat dgn mereka sbb kami sama mewakili sekolah utk pertandingan bahas bahasa inggeris. Itulah first time ana masuk bahas BI, ana join pun sbb ana nak improvekan penguasaan BI..takut sangat masa volunteer nak join tu..tapi pengalaman yg ditimba lepas berbahas dikhalayak ramai, especially bila menang adalah something yang tak mungkin dapat ana lupakan, InsyaAllah…


So spjg sekolah ana sentiasa lihat disekeliling ana kawan2 yg pelbagai bangsa dan agama, sama2 tolong menolong, bergurau senda bersama, makan lunch sesama, gi rumah masing2, study group..etc. time solat, org islam akan mintak excuse tuk gi masjid or musolla.. In fact yg kristian tu pulak yang sibuk.."eh, sudah pukul 4, Intan kene persi sembahyang…" so kami pun rehatlah dari bincang2 pasal debate..baguskan ada solat nie..otak boleh berehat bila penat bekerja..takderlah kita paksa2 otak bekerja sampai tepu..




Bila masuk uni, itulah kali pertama ana nampak perbezaan yang ketara. Of coz bila jejak kaki masuk universiti semua orang pun berdebar2. tak tahu apakah kejutan hidup sbg seorang mahasiawa/ siswi..apatahlagi bagi budak2 yang amik course medik nie..semua orang macam ada prejudis terhadap orang lain..masing2 cuba mengukur sapa agaknya yang lebih pandai, saper yang nampak stylo cam anak orang kaya, saper budak key ell..mesti dianggap berlagak..aduss..datang uni nak belajar lah wei..

Anyway lepas 5 tahun jadik pelajar perubatan, ana nampak betapa prejudisnya satu kaum dgn kaum yang lain, to the extend yang ana rasa TAK LOGIK…Ana selalu berada ditengah2, tersepit antara kawan bukan islam dan sahabat yg beragama Islam. Kebetulan ana mempunyai buddy senior yang sangat pandai dan baik hati, dia selalu bagi nota2 dia pada ana..then nota2 nie ana share dgn kawan2 ana yang ana rapat. Ana perasan org lain yg ana tak rapat pun ada jugak nota2 yang sama, most probably dapat dari senior masing2..tak pernah dorg offer pun any nota kat ana, so ana pun diam jerlah..then Preetiba and siew wah yang sangat rapat dgn ana ternampak nota tu dalam beg ana..(kitorg mmg sgt rapat, bukak beg masing2 tu is not an offendlah.) mestilah mereka tanya "eh, intan nota tu awak dapat dari mana? Boleh kami tengok?", ana jawablah.."tengoklah..=)" preetiba dan siew wah pun cakaplah boleh tak dia nak fotostate buku nota tu, ana pun bagilah. In fact ana yang volunteer nak fotostatekan sbb ana duk rumah jer, kedai fotostate depan rumah, dorg duk hostel, nak gi kedai fotostate jauuuh.

2 minggu lepas tu ana dapat call dari sorg classmate yang ana langsung tak kamcheng..dia MARAH2 ana sbb ana EXPOSEkan buku nota tu kat kaum lain.. APEKAH? Punyalah dia upset, seolah2 ana melanggar hak asasi manusia ke aper..ana sgt terkejut.. Dan of cozlah, upset jugak.."aku buat salahke memanjangkan ILMU medik hak Allah nie kepada org bukan islam?" ana cakap kat dia yang well, ana tatau buku tu rahsia..setau ana, masa abang bazli bagi buku tu kat ana, dia tak cakap sepatah pun pasal RAHSIE..kalau iyelah buku tu rahsie, pastilah ana pon tanak..tak kuasa nak bersekongkol dgn org yang kedekut ilmu Allah nie…lepas berjaya mengeluarkan nafsu amarah dia pada ana..dia pun meng'call end'kan perbualan kitorang. Sejujurnya, ana rasa cam nak lempang je budak tu..stiap hari bermula hari tu bila ana nampak dia ana rasa nak bagi flying kick (cam flying kiss tu, tapi kat montot..ahahks ..XD)..tapi Ana adalah seorang yang penyabar (hahaha, tapi sabar saya ada hadnya, bila meletups, gunung krakatoa pon respek, hohoho..tak caya tanyalah skoolmate.., ngeeee...)

Tp bermula dari saat tu barulah Allah bagi ana nampak dengan senampak-nampaknya betapa KEDEKUT ILMU nya segelintir org islam melayu nie..tak tahulah nak cakap apa..sbg org islam melayu yang berhubung rapat dgn org beragama lain, Ana rasa sangat malu..If org yg kedekut ilmu tu dapat top of the class tu lainlah..ini tidak, yang top of the class org bangsa lain jugak…or at least, orang melayu yang tak kedekut ilmu cam saya..heeeeeeeeee, (oops, terperasan japs..XD)

Ana cherita kat preetiba, vindhu, kiran, siew wah, ck, narinder, dan too tentang hal nie..ana kata sorilah buku tu rahsia rupanya, kalau korang nak pakai, baca kat umah jer lah, tayah bawak gi kelas, kalo dorg nampak, pasti dorg akan call marah2 saya lagi..huhuhu.[.cam nak nanges jer.].so meke pun ikutlah cakap ana..ini berlaku masa ana tahun 4, posting..O&G..ngahahahahaha..sorilah sesaper yang terkene tu yer..nama awak saya tak sebut pun kat sini, takper kan..ni true story tau.

Ana bukan rapat ngan preeti n yang lain tu masa 4th year jer..ana memang rapat ngan dorg sejak 1st year lagi....mgkn org igt ana nie sorg yang MODEN, mesti org macam ana ni dressing gaya barat, pilih kawan..nak kawan ngan orang pandai jer, org non jer..org melayu ana tak kawan.saya buka seorang yang sosial.mintak mahap sket..ana sentiasa pakai baju kurung masa kat uni tau.tudung xpenah tinggal.yang MODEN hanyalah akal fikiran saya, bukan gaya hidup saya..akal fikiran moden saya mengatakan yang tak guna orang islam cuba menyembunyikan kebaikan/ilmu hak Allah dari org bukan islam..perbuatan tu hanya menyebabkan meke salah anggap terhadap keindahan dan kemuliaan agama kita nie..bila kita buat camtu, dorg tak fikir yang org melayu jahat, tapi dorang fikir org ISLAM jahat..dapat pahala ke bila kita buat camtu? Dapat keredhaan Allah ke? Tepuk dada tanya amalan..okey...


Allah turunkan agama Islam kat dunia nie tuk bawa keamanan dan kemakmuran..tak elok sangat bila orang islam tu instead of jadik contoh kpd org lain, dia jadi racun pulak dalam masyarakat..HASAD DENGKI pula dgn org lain..bila dia tahu dia tak berapa pandai, dia sembunyikan pula nota dari org yang nampak cam lebih pandai daripada dia supaya, kalau dia tak dapat A, orang lain pun tak bleyh dapat A..

APEKAH INI?

Malah ada sorg senior pompuan yang setahun tua sket dari ana..dia sangat baik, seorang pompuan melayu yang simple aja.. Lepas tahun 2 semua org perasan yg dia berchenta dgn sorg senior lelaki cina…dia mendapat kutukan yg hebat dari segelintir student dan pensyarah melayu. Di pulaukan dari join2 kelas2 tambahan sebelum exam, sebab kalau ajak dia, dia mesti akan ajak boyfren cina dia tu, so tak jadi rahsia lagilah kelas tu..


DUNIA, apekah ini? Biarlah dorang kapel..bukan bergesel2 badan, berpegang2 tangan pon, setakat study sesama..budak cina tuh siap praktis poser lagi..pas jadi dokter, meke kawen, brother tu pun masok islam..skrg kopiah tak pernah lekang dari kepala dia. Dah buat master radiology pun dia..BANGGANYA ana dengan dorang..=)...ini yang kita hendak..ramaikan lagi dokter pakar yang ISLAM..tak kesahlah bangsa apa, asalkan islam…perbuatan segelintir melayu islam yang mengejek dan mengutuk dulu tu langsung tak membantu, kan…


Oleh itu, ana nak menyeru (cewwah..ayat..XD) kepada sesape yang terlintas kat page nie, sesaper yg Allah tergerakkan hati dia tu meluangkan masa baca entry ni ingatlah, siapa kita..Kita orang ISLAM..apakah peranan kita di bumi Allah ini?, menjadi Khalifah..manusia adalah khalifah..tetapi manusia beragama islam adalah khalifah dikalangan manusia lain..adakah layak kita bergelar khalifah kalau kita tak menunjukkan perangai yang elok? Dengan perangai yang hancusss nie, mampukah kita berdiri dihadapan Allah diakhirat nanti menjawab kenapa kita bersifat tidak adil sesama manusia?..JAWAB..jangan tak jawab..masa tue menggigil seluruh badan, mulut berkunci, kaki, tangan, otak, hati, hempedu, mata, telinga, montot semua akan tolong jawabkan.."Ya, Allah, kami iri hati dan dengki dengan kelebihan yang Kau berikan pada mereka, sebab tulah kami buat apa yang kami buat masa di dunia dulu..".. Alamatlah kalo jawab camtu, tak lepaslah titian as-sirat…


MARILAH KITA BERINGAT.

Wallahualam

wassalam

I just haven't met you yet

I'm Not Surprised
Not Everything Lasts
Have Broken My Heart So Many Times,
I Stopped Keepin Track.
Talk Myself In
I Talk Myself Out
I Get All Worked Up
Then I Let Myself Down.

I Tried So Very Hard Not To Lose It
I Came Up With A Million Excuses
I Thought I Thought Of Every Possibility

And I kNow Someday That It'll All Turn Out
You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out
And I Promise You Kid That I'll Give So Much More Than I Get
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

Mmmmm ....

I Might Have To Wait
I'll Never Give Up
I Guess It's Half Time
And The Other Half's Luck
Wherever You Are
Whenever It's Right
You Come Out Of Nowhere And Into My Life

And I Know That We Can Be So Amazing
And Baby Your Love Is Gonna Change Me
And Now I Can See Every Possibility

Hmmmmm ......

And Somehow I Know That Will All Turn Out
And You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out
And I Promise You Kid I'll Give So Much More Than I Get
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

They Say All's Fair
And In Love And War
But I Won't Need To Fight It
We'll Get It By It ??
To Be United

And I Know That We Can Be So Amazing
And Being In Your Life Is Gonna Change Me
And Now I Can See Every Single Possibility

Hmmm .....

And Someday I Know It'll All Turn Out
And I'll Work To Work It Out
Promise You Kid I'll Give More Than I Get
Than I Get Than I Get han I Get

Oh You Know It Will All Turn Out
And You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out
And I Promise You Kid To Give So Much More Than I Get
Yeah I Just Haven't Met You Yet

I Just Haven't Met You Yet
Oh Promise You Kid
To Give So Much More Than I Get

I Said Love Love Love Love Love Love Love .....
I Just Haven't Met You Yet
Love Love Love .....
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

Kucing comel...feeling accomplished =^.^=


Hari ni hari Selasa. Bagi org lain hari selasa tak ada bezanya dengan hari rabu, khamis, hari mengundi, mahupun hari pekerja..Tp bagi ana hari selasa adalah hari yg sangat penting sbb inilah harinya semua orang dalam team Waddell akan bermeeting sepenoh hati.

Ana penah skolah menengah, malah jadik ketua pengawas perempuan lagi masa skola..mmg mencabarlah sbb kita kene jaga semua org dalam skola, organize sumer kegiatan sekolah..penat sgt..org sekolah dari kul 7.30 sampai 1.30 ana sampai 5 ptg baru balek rumah… sekolah dah jadik rumah kedua..meskipun camtu,, ana tak penah rasa kehidupan sbg student yg lebih mencabar dari jadik student PhD di negara orang nie. Walaupun masa kat uni amik course medik yang org kata sangat mencabar, ana tetap rasa PhD nie 7 juta kali ganda lebih mencabar dari itu.. In fact kpd adik2 sedara yang mmg nekad nak amik medik, ana selalu je nasehat kat dorg, medik tak susah, anis, ain..medik senang jer, Cuma baaanyak sgt yg kita kene hafal..kene rajin baca buku n pergi wad clerk patients..mmg susah nak tgk ana merungut yang belajar nie susah..sampailah ana masuk UWA buat master then sambung PhD.

kenapa susah buat PhD?

PhD ni bukan belaja dari buku cam dulu. Dulu tatau pengamiran bukak buku add math..nak penjelasan yg lebih detail lagi, bukak buku rujukan pulak..tatau lagi, tanya abang kakak mak ayah sumer, dorg sure tau punyerlah. Apa pun masalah, ada jer jalan penyelesaiannyer..terpulang rajin ke tidak kita nak cari jalan penyelesaian tersebut..

Sama jerlah cam masa kat matrix…kalau buku rujukan matrix tak cukup, carilah buku rujukan university pulak..insyaAllah, cari2 lama2 dapat jawapan punyerlah..

Medik laaagi senang. Berapa juta buku medik ada dalam dunia nie… buku original ada, buku fotostate ada..buku e book pon ada..nak baca atau tidak ajer. Bila rajin baca, pandailah, tak rajin baca tak pandai sgtlah..

Beza ngan PhD ialah, apa yangkita nak buat nie benda baru..research tak di namakan research kalau orang lain dah jumpa dulu kan..jadi kita kene cari seberapa banyak maklumat yang boleh..tuk dapatkan jawapan yang samar2 terhadap research yang kita nak buat nie..kalau tatau, jangan harap nak jumpa jawapan dia dalam buku sbb takder..jangan harap nak tanya cekgu sbb dia pun tatau.."awak tanya saya buat apa? Nak tahu kita kenelah buat experimentnya dulu"…itulah jawapan yang ada.

Jadi once melangkah kaki jadi master atau PhD student nie..kita basically kene berdikari. Cara tuk dapat maklumat ialah dgn baca research orang lain..berapa ramaikah saintis dalam dunia nie..semua research mereka kita kene baca demi nak dapat kepastian yg research yg kita nak buat nie dorg belum buat lagi…

Dari bulan julai sampai skrg, dah beratus2 research org lain ana skodeng..baru hari nie ..di pagi Selasa nan indah nie, ana presentkan pada supervisor omputeh ana tue, apa yang ana akan buat tuk research ana spjg 3 tawun ana menjadik student dia..

4 bulan duk membaca medical, biological, chemistry, genetic, metabolic, endocrinology and obesity punyer journal utk dapat conclusion apa yang ana kene buat bg tempoh 3 tahun akan datang..Mata saya sampai dah nak terkeluar dari soketnyer tau.. Tp semua berbaloi sbb pas abes presentation tu, tader sorg pon tertido..and sumer org tepuk tangan cakap "very good, Intan..nice Work..you have been busy"..dalam hati ana cakap.."you have no idea, sir…" tp kat luar hati cakaplah..toce..toce..tima kaseh..sengeh jer lah..takkan nak bangga diri pulak..nie semuaAllah yg bagi..bangga sgt nanti Allah tarik balik karang…jadi bangga sket jer lah..hohohoho..=^.^=


gambar di atas menunjukkan ke'happy'an tahap euphoria seorang PhD student apabila presentationnyer berjaya..agagagagagaga...XD

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