Intan Zulkafli, MD

 

Hopefully, reminiscing on happy days will keep me at bay from this unhappiness about how my research turned out. For one whole day I have been mourning about this, may be it’s time to dissect the whole thing up and think about what I can learn from this horrible experience.

It turns out that I am not very good at sharing my feelings. I can write thousands of words describing how awful I feel but I can never talk about it to anyone. Although I know I am some what introvert, I never knew that I am also introvert in this “area”. Sometimes I pity those people around me that wish I could share more of my problems with them. But what can I say? I was so used to be sharing happy positive things with people, I guess sharing sad and painful things made me uneasy. And as a result of keeping it all in, I had a headache today. just a short one that I easily shook off by a 10-minute-nap.

Another random thing that I am going to share with you guys today is about mourning for a passing friend who is also a non-Muslim. I have always wondered if I could go to one. Will it be against my faith? Because 2 weeks after completing our professional medical examination back then in 2006, a colleague passed away from leukaemia. He was a very bright and hard working Chinese boy. It is funny with someone that no longer with you, you tend to always recall the last time that you talked to them. And my last conversation with him was about 3 weeks before his death, when I inquire about his sudden significant weight loss. and he casually denied me, saying that it was all the stress of exam that hindered his appetite. I wished I talked longer. Though we are not really close, he had always been very nice and helpful, naturally I would want my last memory with him was a bit more significant than just that. And when we talk about death and passing, suddenly everything seemed very eerily quite.

And when we were informed that he passed, Siew Wah, Xin Ting and Vindhu asked me if I were going to his memorial service. unfortunately I didn’t know whether I should go or not or what is Islam’s point of view on going to a non-Muslim funeral. I am going to check about it and report it back to you guys soon.