why don’t I just slack away from my prayers today and repay them back in double tomorrow?

My big programming study is well underway. There is a reason why the word “BIG” precede the description of my project. Because amongst many things, being BIG is the best description for it.

Firstly, BIG amount of money had been invested and will be invested on it. And compared to the last programming project, this one involves BIGGER number of rodents. And most importantly, it is the BIGGEST thing happening in my life right now.

Thinking about the project can easily send chills down my spine. In total, 768 rats will be generated from 96 pregnant mothers and 300 or so of them will be culled. 350 kg of standard diet, 350 kg of high fat diet and 350kg of high fat, high omega-3 diets will be ordered and used. The amount of animal work will be MASSIVE which include daily pregnancy generation, daily offspring body weight and food intake measurement, training the rats for blood pressure measurement, training myself for cardiac ultrasound and performing DEXA radiation scan. Should I mention the “odd hours” tissue collection that will be done at 8am, 2pm, 8pm and 2 am. No, it was not a typo, I did consciously typed 2 am.

I supposed, I had been given enough times to come into terms with the massive amount of works destined for me. And I am not the least bit worry because, I know myself, InsyaAllah, I can push through, Ameen..

If I could survive back to back calls, this should be manageable. I didn’t mean to brag but, none on these works involve a continuous 58 hours of continuous standing, running around doing cardiac resuscitation or chasing x-rays. and most importantly none of these works involve total sleep deprivation. there will be some altered sleep pattern that will ultimately screw up my circadian rhythm… but it will be worth it.

In fact I do feel a bit lucky because at least there is a PhD degree awarded at the end of it. because if I was still doing calls, the money received get spent almost immediately. and how much did I make a night? wasn’t it just 100 Ringgit a night? Subhanallah…. those of you who are still doing that, I salute you.

So Jess, in response to your question, “why don’t I just slack away from my prayers today and repay them back in double tomorrow?,” I have to say that unfortunately I can’t. This PhD thing is already so huge, I don’t know if I could do it alone. I can’t be arrogant because I need Allah’s help, I need Allah’s guidance and I desperately need His love all the more right now.